


Happy Birthday, Google!/Happy Halloween!

by Doctor_Discord



Series: The Ego Manor [121]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Arachnophobia, Bing is a Sweetheart, Birthday, Birthday Fluff, Birthday Presents, Competition, Costume Parties & Masquerades, Cute, Drunkenness, Eric is Cute as Hell, Fem!Dark, Flower Crowns, Fluff and Humor, Genderfluid Character, Genderfluid Dark, Google is Adorable, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, Just Add Kittens, Magic, Stun Gun Baton, and a little shit, halloween decorations, halloween party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-04 17:29:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21201404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doctor_Discord/pseuds/Doctor_Discord
Summary: It's Google's birthday! It's also Halloween! Cue the celebratory shenanigans, featuring the Septic crew as well!





	1. Happy Birthday, Google!

It was Halloween.

It also happened to be Google’s birthday.

So when he woke up to the sound of ‘This Is Halloween’ blasting over what could only be Bing’s speakers, he wasn’t exactly surprised.

He rolled over in bed with a low hum, smiling softly and core humming pleasantly, eyes still closed. He couldn’t help crinkling up his face, however, when a loud ‘_Mrrowr!_’ rang out and he felt Peggy (she alternated between sleeping with Bing and the Host, her two favorite beings in the manor) squirm out from under him, her paws audibly hitting the floor as she, presumably, scrambled under the bed. The music stopped, and Google finally cracked open an eye to see Bing’s beaming face. “Hey Googs! Happy birthday!”

Google made a sound like a low purr, closing his eye again. “Thank you, Bing.” His brow furrowed, and raised one arm pathetically, pouting. “Why are you out of bed?”

“Because it’s like 7:50am, Google, breakfast starts in ten minutes.”

Google’s tiny smile returned. “So? Come here.” He sighed with content when he felt the bed dip, and Bing climbed into his arms. He was quick to curl back around him, intertwining their legs and burying his face in Bing’s hair. “Much better…”

Bing gave a tiny laugh, shifting closer to him. “This is new. You’re usually so adamantly punctual.”

Google chuckled against his hair. “I believe I have the right to indulge myself for a single day.”

Bing laughed again. “I’m not complaining.”

Google easily slipped into sleep-mode, not quite powered off, but not aware either, the equivalent of a light doze. At some point, Peggy had moved back onto the bed, wedging herself between them and purring up a storm. Eventually, Google forced himself awake when his internal alarmed flashed 8:00am across his vision. He pressed a sleepy kiss to Bing’s head, sighing happily through his nose, and began to shift. Peggy shifted with him, happily settling in his lap as he sat up, and nudged Bing back awake.

Bing blinked his eyes open groggily, grinning sleepily at the sight of Google petting a purring Peggy in his lap. “You’re the ****in’ cutest thing, you know that?”

Google chuckled, blue beginning to dust his cheeks. “You tell me that every morning, Bing. Come on, it’s time to get ready.”

Soon after, the two of them trailed into the kitchen, Peggy still purring in Google’s arms. Bim spotted them first, beaming widely at them. “Hey, there they are!”

Google was quickly met with a chorus of “_Happy Birthday!_” and the whirr of Dr. Iplier’s sonic screwdriver, the ego clearly still utterly amazed and in awe of the device.

Google laughed, blushing a little darker as he slid into his chair, settling Peggy in his lap. “Thank you.” He smiled softly, gazing down at the little cat and continuing to pet her.

“I gotta say, I don’t think you’ve ever been so openly relaxed.” Silver shot him a warm smile, rubbing at his own arms. “It’s nice.”

Google’s smile brightened. “Yes well…I’ve never really cared much for my birthday, but…well, a lot of things have changed since the last one.” He glanced at Bing out of the corner of his eye, who promptly blushed bright orange and pushed his shades further up his nose. Google shrugged. “Plus, it’s also the one day out of the year where it’s socially acceptable to scare the _shit _out of children.”

He grinned as the others bust out laughing – Ed actually had to back away from the stove after he nearly dropped his pan. Bing suddenly gasped, borderline slamming his hands down on the table. “That reminds me! The Septics have proposed a competition over who has the scariest house decorations and stuff like that, judged at midnight of course. And they invited us over for a costume party around ten. Am I good to accept?”

“Oh yeah, Jackie told me about that!” Silver grinned. “Sounds really fun!”

Dark raised an eyebrow, taking a sip from his mug. “I don’t see why not.”

King frowned, fiddling with his cape. “How are we gonna win this late in the game? We’re efficient, but not _that _efficient.”

Dark chuckled, aura swirling and his eyes flickering briefly. “Just _watch_.”

Bim bounced a little in his seat. “Ooh, that sounds _very _promising! I can’t wait!”

“In the meantime, however…” Wilford smiled in Google’s direction. “We have a birthday to celebrate!”

Dr. Iplier glanced up from fiddling with the settings on his screwdriver long enough to shoot a glance at Ed. “Yo Ed, what’s taking so long?”

Ed flipped him off, not even turning around. “Give me a fuckin’ second! I’ve never made crepes before and I’ve never even _heard _of whatever the fuck ‘dulce de leche’ is!”

Google’s eyes widened, blue rapidly spreading down his face and neck. “How do you…” He turned to Bing, briefly halting his stroking of Peggy’s back. “What…?”

Bing grinned cheekily. “_You _may be able to hide your secrets from me but sweet little _Ollie _is _very _easy to make crack. Plus, it’s a birthday tradition to make your favorite! Dunno _where _you first tried this but I am personally very curious.”

Google ducked his head, sending a _signal _towards Oliver and smirking slightly when Green sent him an audio clip of Oliver yelping. He opened his mouth to say something more, but then Ed was swearing colorfully behind him and Bim snorted, laughter in his voice. “Ed, do you need help?”

“…Possibly.”

Bim snorted again, standing and moving to go help the poor cowboy. Google allowed himself a tiny smile, face still burning bright blue as he leaned over to press a kiss to Bing’s cheek. The Host tilted his head, a small smirk on his face. “While the egos are waiting, the Host suggests they give Google his present now.”

The Jims immediately scrambled out of their seats, screaming “_We’re on it!_” as they raced down the hall.

King paled. “Not on your own you’re not, hold on!” He bolted out of his own chair, chasing them down the hall.

Google chuckled, closing his eyes as Peggy continued to purr in his lap. Without really thinking about it, he leaned his head onto Bing’s shoulder, making a noise that might as well have been a soft, quiet version of Peggy’s purr. He pressed a gentle kiss to the side of Bing’s neck. “…I love you.”

Bing laughed, the hand of the shoulder Google was laying on coming up to rest on Google’s cheek. “I love you, too, man. I swear, I don’t know _what _happened as you woke up this morning but you have never been so affectionate and soft in your entire existence and I love it.” Google just hummed again, blissed little smile on his face.

He lifted his head again however, when the tell-take giggling of the twins reached his ears, and the pair was barreling around the corner, King hot on their heels, with a decent-sized box wrapped in black, white polka-dotted paper between them. Google raised an eyebrow, gently nudging Peggy over into Bing’s lap instead as he took the present.

He wasn’t expecting it to be so _heavy_.

He nearly dropped the box in surprise, giving Bing a wide-eyed glance before stripping it of the paper, opening the box carefully. He laughed, surveying the others quickly. “Did you guys _really _pack whatever’s in here with spare parts?”

Bing laughed beside him. “It was Reynolds’ idea. And they’re not _just _spare parts. It’s a whole bunch of outdated stuff, like they don’t make them anymore.” He rubbed the back of his neck, glancing at Dark. “I may have gone on a bit ah…_overboard _when I dismantled a bunch of stuff in the attic recently, and I’m not gonna use _all _of it, so…it’s yours. Now dig around, man!”

Google obediently reached inside the box, rummaging around in the spare parts. His brow furrowed when he came in contact with something _else_. It was still metal, but it felt…_tingly _when his fingers touched it. He gave Bing another odd glance as he pulled it out, revealing a smooth, metal stick. “…What is it?”

“It’s a stun gun baton!” Wilford beamed at him, bouncing a little in his chair. “_It’s a zappy stick!_”

Google laughed, glancing at Bing again, who just shrugged. “He’s not wrong. With a little bit of custom flare, too. On the highest setting, it could kill a human with just one touch.”

Google’s eyes flashed, a wide grin spreading across his face as he rested the baton in his palm, gripping tight to the handle with his other. “Really now…” He pressed the button at the base, visibly delighting at the blue electricity that sparked from the prongs at the end, only feeling slightly guilty when Peggy leapt out of Bing’s lap and scrambled away. His eyes flashed again as he shot Bing a sly look, grin to match. “What happens if I use it on _you?_”

The immediate _dark _orange blush that rapidly spread across Bing’s face and neck was all the answer he needed.

He chuckled, pressing the button again and watching the electricity flow with a _very _satisfying noise before resting it back in the box, setting that on the floor. “Thank you guys. That is…_delightful_.”

Silver smiled. “You’re welcome. Just…try not to zap any of us, alright?”

Google just grinned.

“On _that _note…” Bim set down a plate in front of Google, and his eyes flashed yet again. “Crepes and homemade dulce de leche. _Enjoy_.”

* * *

The rest of the day passed by smoothly with Halloween preparations (and scrambles to get admittedly last-minute costumes, thank God for magic and Dark’s decade closet). As 10:00pm approached, Google slid open Bing’s door, laughing at the sight of Bing staring in the mirror and adding the finishing touches to his Frankenstein’s Monster makeup. He’d gone all out, two bolts actually driven into the sides of his neck and peeling back his synthetic skin a bit, and his skin itself had been given a sickly, gaunt green color, black stitches sewn into his skin in various places across his face, throat, and arms. His signature tank-top had been shredded a bit at the bottom, as well. It would take some time to repair him tomorrow, but, well, it would take some time for Google to fix himself as well.

Bing turned to face him, grinning at him and mouth open to say something, but it quickly fell as a look of alarm overshadowed it, actually jolting back a bit. “Holy ****! You are…_unsettling_.”

Google chuckled again, sliding the door closed. He’d spent the past couple hours in his office redesigning his facial features to look less human, intentionally landing smack in the Uncanny Valley. His face was a little smoother, his skin a little glossier, his eyes just a _little_ too bright. “That is the point.”

Bing shuddered, setting his makeup brush down in favor of plopping down in his desk chair and pulling open one of his desk drawers. “Yes well, your terrifying face aside, I wanted to give you your birthday present before we leave.” He held up a flash drive, and Google raised an eyebrow before turning around, allowing Bing to insert the device into the port on the back of his neck.

Instantly his vision was flooded with a stream of pictures, and he gasped, stumbling back a bit. They…were all pictures of _him_. Bing was in some of them, likely taken by Oliver instead, but it was mostly just a montage of Google himself smiling and blushing and in general gazing at Bing with suck _fondness_ he couldn’t quite believe Bing never short-circuited. He recognized some of the pictures, like a few of the ones Bing took during Christmas last year after he wrapped Google up in tinsel and decorated him like a Christmas tree, and there were _more _than a few of Google trapped on the couch with a purring, kitten Peggy sleeping in his lap (there was a lot of him and Peggy in general). But the one that had his breath hitching and his core stuttering was an image of him in bed, clearly having just woken up. He was lying on his side, using one arm as a pillow. His eyes were half open and a little dim with sleep, glasses absent, a light blush dusting his cheeks, and such a _soft _smile on his face. He looked…so _happy_. And _human_.

Google turned toward where he assumed Bing still stood, eyes wide as more pictures kept coming. “You…took all of these?”

“Most of them, Ollie took the ones with me in them. But um…i-it’s a slideshow, though you’ve already probably figured that out. I’ve been ah…_amassing _a gallery of all the most human moments I’ve discovered you in, because, well, you just looked so _happy_. And I wanted to remember them. Figured I’d share.”

Google swallowed hard, doing his best to blink back tears. “How many are in here?”

Bing laughed nervously. “…Over a thousand, at least. And that’s not even all of them. I was a bit paranoid I’d come off creepy, taking secret pictures, but…”

Google shook his head slowly, eyes nearly blinding with how bright they were glowing. “No, I don’t think it’s creepy. I…don’t know what to say, actually. Thank you. I…just thank you, Bing.”

He pulled the drive free of his neck with one shaking hand, turning it over in his fingers for a moment and smiling before tucking it away in his chest’s storage compartment. Still smiling, he held his arms open, and Bing came running at him, jumping into his arms and locking his legs around Google’s waist, cupping Google’s face in his hands and pulling him into a kiss. When they eventually parted, cores humming in perfect harmony, Bing stroked his cheek with the back of one hand, pressing their foreheads together. “I have one last surprise for you. Keep your eyes closed.”

Google raised one eyebrow, but obeyed, humming softly as Bing connected their lips in another kiss. He felt Bing’s hands leave his face, and then his brow was furrowing as something stuck to his head, the sensation instantly making him feel jittery and fidgety – the tell-tale signs of a magnet. Bing broke the kiss again, too busy giggling to himself as Google set him down. Google frowned, attempting to see whatever Bing stuck to his head but of course to no avail. “…What did you do?”

Bing didn’t respond, just continued to giggle to himself and gestured to the mirror. Google him an odd look as he walked over, glancing at his reflection. His jaw dropped, poking at the flower crown stuck to his head. “What the _fuck_, Bing?!”

Bing _lost his shit _at that, falling back onto the bed with his arms wrapped around his middle. Google scrunched up his face, attempting to pull the thing off but to no avail, the crown not budging an inch and firmly stuck to his head. He made a distressed noise, and Bing managed to compose himself long enough to gasp out, “It’s no use, Google! I made that thing myself, it’s not coming off till _I _disengage the magnet!” He burst into a new fit of giggles when Google pulled another face and poked at the bright pink, metallic flower crown again. “Don’t worry, you still look_ very _unsettling! But now you’re _cute _and unsettling!”

Google snorted. “Thanks.” A permanent grumpy expression now stuck to his face, he grabbed Bing’s hand, dragging him off the bed and out the door. “Now come on. Let’s go to a party.”


	2. Happy Halloween!

Turns out, Bing and Google were two of the last egos to enter the living area. Even Red, Green, and Oliver were there before them – dressed as nightmarish ghoul, what looked like a cross between a zombie and an elf or a nymph, and a pirate complete with the Twitter bird Bing had made them each respectively. Google smirked at the amount of disturbed looks he got, letting go of Bing’s hand in favor of clasping his own behind his back. “Are we ready to go?”

“No.” Reynolds glanced up from his phone, wearing the most stereotypical cheap-ass Spider-Man costume Google had ever seen, minus the mask. “We’re still waiting on Bim and King.”

Dr. Iplier snorted, hair spiked up and wearing a blue pinstripe suit and one of the Host’s trench coats, fiddling with his screwdriver and clearly going for the Tenth Doctor with his costume. “God knows what they’re doing. Considering what Bim said his costume is, they might be a while.”

Eric shrunk, dressed in a black t-shirt and equally black jeans, a pair of large black rabbit ears resting on his head with one of said ears bent over and petting Midnight in his lap, a small black woven basket with what looked like padding consisting of a bunch of his shirts resting on the couch beside him. “I really don’t like what that implies…”

“I volunteer to drag them out here!” Wilford bounced to his feet, dressed in what looked suspiciously like his white wedding suit and a pair of fluffy white angel wings strapped to his back, a shimmering golden halo suspended above his head.

Dark drew her (she’d shifted into her feminine form about half way through the day, around 2:00pm) mouth in tight line, grabbing his arm and pulling him back to the couch. “Don’t you dare, Wil. Let them be.” She was dressed in a tight, low-cut black dress with a zig-zag pattern cut into the bottom, black stockings and blood red high heels. An equally blood red, triangle-pointed tail twitched at her side, red horns emerging from the sides of her head. Her lipstick was also bright red, her eyes shifted to their respective colors, wings that could cut steel once more painted on with eyeshadow to match her respective eyes.

Ed rolled his eyes, leaning up against the wall between the loveseat occupied by the twins (who were dressed as Fred and George Weasley, complete with spray-on red hair dye) and his usual armchair, which Reynolds had stolen. He himself didn’t do much to dress up, wearing his usual cowboy outfit, but wore a noose around his neck and makeup that made his face appear gaunt and sunken in, light red circles around his eyes (unlike Bing, Ed didn’t wear his sunglasses at night like a dumbass). He glared pointedly at Silver across the living area, raising an eyebrow. “I still can’t believe you dressed up as Jackie. That’s the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen.”

Silver pouted, picking at his red morph suit. “Hey, fuck off, Ed! I know for a _fact _he dressed like me so shut it!”

“That’s really cute!” At last, Bim and King rounded the corner, hand-in-hand. Bim was dressed as a vampire, wearing a black cape with a velvety purple interior and his usual suit, and he’d either put in bright red contacts or magicked his eyes the color. If magic was the answer, it wasn’t the only thing he’d magicked about his appearance; he kept opening his mouth every few seconds to run his tongue over his fangs. He’d put black glitter in his hair, too, only visible when he stood in the light.

King was dressed as a werewolf, clumps of brown fur stuck in patches along his arms and face (the fact that his throat and shoulders were completely covered was a pretty clear indicator of what the pair had been doing for so long). His jeans were torn in several places, more fur visible through the tears, with a decently shredded red and black flannel loosely hanging off of him.

Bing raised an eyebrow at the two of them, decidedly ignoring how red King was and how he kept messing with the fur on the side of his throat. “Dude, are you really going as a sparkly vampire?”

Bing grinned, quite menacing with his fangs now glinting in the moonlight peeking through the window. He ran a hand through his hair as his spoke, his skin tone noticeably considerably paler than usual. “Yes I am! I am _much _more fabulous than any Twilight wannabe bitch.”

Dr. Iplier choked, slapping a hand over his mouth as his shoulders shook with laughter. “Whatever you say, Bim.”

The Host chuckled, shaking his head fondly, then stood. The blind man was dressed as a mummy, his mildly bloodstained bandages now blending in seamlessly with the rest of his costume, his hair an untamed mess and hiding half his face from view, his blond streak more pronounced than ever. “The Host suggests the egos get moving, else they will be late.”

Dark smirked, flicking her tail, which at some point had wrapped itself around Wilford’s wrist. “And that, dear Host, is why teleportation was created.” She waved a hand, standing as well as the tear in the Void appeared. She pulled Wilford to his feet as well by her tail’s grip on his wrist, then pecked his cheek, leaving a blatant lipstick mark. “Wil, bring up the rear, won’t you, love? Don’t want anyone getting lost in the Void.” Wilford simply nodded dumbly, and Dark winked, smiling, and released his wrist, her high heels clicking loudly even on the carpet as she approached the tear. “Come on, single file.”

Dark lead the fifteen of them through the Void, Wilford trailing behind, and within no time they popped out in front of the Septic Manor. The place looked _amazing_, massive webs strung up all over the front of the house, with giant spiders nestled in the centers. Every few seconds, the lights of one window on a higher floor would flicker on, revealing the vague silhouette of someone hanging by their throat in the window. With the deep purple color the house was painted looking like massive shadows clinging to the building and the untamed ‘garden’ splayed out across the front yard, it indeed looked like a haunted house straight from a movie.

But it was _nothing _compared to home.

One of the spiders moved, its shifting legs making the _worst _noise that had most if not all of them cringing horribly – but none worse than Google. He tried to subtly hide behind Bing and Oliver, eyes trained on the spiders, but he was given away by Bing’s laugh. “I forgot, you’re scared of spiders, aren’t you, Googs?”

Google hissed, eyes flashing red. “I am _not _afraid!” Another spider moved, scuttling down its web vaguely towards them, and Google made a strangled noise, pressing closer to Bing. “…I just don’t like them.”

Bing laughed again, taking his hand and squeezing it. “Whatever makes you feel better, man, come on!”

The group made their way to the front door, Bing continuing to drag along an unwilling Google, and Dark rang the doorbell with her tail, arms crossed. There was a crash from inside the house, followed by an unintelligible shout in the thicker Irish accent unique to Jackie, and then the hero himself was throwing open the door, grinning madly. “Hey! You guys made it!”

Jackie – indeed dressed as Silver – glanced at Dark, but didn’t say a word, expression unchanging as he held the door open wider and retreated back inside. Google didn’t miss the relieved look on Dark’s face, though it was brief; he knew for a fact that Bing had given Chase a heads up about her appearance, and he had no doubt that Silver, Dr. Iplier, Bim, and the Jims had informed their own Septic friends as well. Clearly, the gesture was appreciated.

The seventeen of them filed inside, Jackie hovering in the air above them and quickly joined by Silver. “As a fair warnin’, guys, as some of you already know, Anti likes t’hang out in the walls, and Halloween’s his favorite holiday. He’s been poppin’ out and scarin’ the _shit _out of us all day. Scared Robbie so bad earlier he accidentally chucked his own head at the wall. So keep an eye out.”

Bim snorted, licking his fangs again as he ran a hand through his hair. “Fantastic. Unstable glitch demon is gonna haunt our asses.”

Jackie just winked at him as he led them to the Septics’ living room, the lights flickering menacingly in what was no doubt Anti’s work as well.

A good portion of them jumped when Jackie spoke again, his voice _ungodly _loud even at a speaking volume, poking his head into the living room. “Hey guys! Guests have arrived!”

Bing was almost immediately tackled by Chase with a unison shout of “_BRO!_”, both of them crashing to the floor. Chase was dressed as a zombie, his hat and clothes looking more tattered than usual and makeup changing his pallor to match almost exactly to Robbie’s. Despite that, Chase was practically _glowing _with happiness, the reason why quickly explained as he immediately began telling Bing all about how Stacy let him take his kids trick-or-treating for the first time in years.

The Jims clapped their hands excitedly, bouncing into the room and sitting down on either side of Robbie, who split in a beaming smile the second he saw the pair. He looked healthier, his skin not as grey and not peeling _nearly _as much, and no visible holes in his body either. A set of glittery, pastel fairy wings likely intended for a child’s costume were strapped to his back, and he was holding loosely onto a wand with a star on the end, matching gaudy ribbon trailing from it. JJ was quick to settle down with them, a pair of twitching black cat ears poking out on either side of his hat and a matching tail swishing at his side.

Marvin appeared out of nowhere in a near blinding flash of green light and a puff of blue smoke, grinning. “Bim!” The magician’s mask had done something _weird_, the upper half of his face covered in white fur with patterns to match his cat mask and a pair of white ears on his head, matching tail wrapped around his waist. He took one look at Bim’s costume, then the furiously blushing King’s covered throat, and started giggling incessantly, wedging himself between them and wrapping his arms around their shoulders, steering them away. “I think you two need some chaperoning, considering I know for a _fact_ Bim’s self-restraint is non-existent. You’re not disappearing into a dark corner on _my _watch.”

Bim quickly matched King’s blush, hiding in his cape as King covered his face with his hands. “_Fuck off, _Marvin! What the _Hell?!_”

Marvin just laughed some more, leading them toward the couch.

Google raised an eyebrow as Marvin apparently _delighted _in embarrassing the shit out of the two, waving his hand and making little purple and gold hearts appear in the air around the couple and giggling non-stop. Dr. Iplier had _long_-since disappeared to chat with Dr. Schneeplestein, the Septic doctor dressed as a plague doctor with a black cloak wrapped around him, the Host blushing lightly under the bandages wrapped around his face and picking at his _actual _bandages as Dr. Iplier dragged him into conversation.

Jackie snickered, turning to him. “Hey! Heard it was your birthday today, too!”

Google smiled a little, tilting his head. “‘Too’…?”

Jackie nodded, gesturing over his shoulder. “Yeah! It’s JJ’s birthday, as well!”

JJ lifted his hat in greeting, a speech slide popping into view. **“2017. You?”**

Google’s smile widened. “2014.”

Jackie glanced at him again, noticeably staring at his forehead. “Gotta ask, what’s with the flower crown? Doesn’t really ah…suit what you’re goin’ for.” He shuddered.

Google scowled, crossing his arms and glaring at Bing, who’d begun to snicker quietly. “_Believe _me, I’d take it off if I could.”

Jackie’s gaze flicked to Bing before cracking up. “Right, well, speaking of costumes…” He placed his fists on his hips, surveying Silver’s costume. “Pretty good job, there, Silver! Though I must say, the color’s a bit off, mine is a _much _more vibrant red, and your mask is just a _tiny _bit crooked.”

Silver snorted, flipping him off. “Ex_cuse_ you, _I _don’t look like _that!_ You look like you threw on a poorly designed panda costume and ripped off the ears!”

Jackie grinned. “Exactly!”

Silver’s mouth fell open with pure indignance, smacking Jackie’s shoulder before rubbing at his own arms and grinning. The two floated toward the ceiling, chatting animatedly with a significant number of digs at each other’s costumes.

The night passed with a _Hell _of amount of candy and sugar and Halloween-themed snacks (apparently JJ was the God-tier baker in the Septic household, him and Bim quickly beginning to compare recipes). Anti had tried to strangle Ed, his hand emerging from the wall and grabbing onto the end of the noose before yanking his hand back in, pinning Ed to the wall as he shouted curses and scrabbled at the rope. Jackie had to bang on the wall and tell him off much like a bad dog before he let go, Ed running as far from the wall as he could as soon as he was free. Anti’s hand had reappeared moments later to flip Jackie off, a gesture he happily returned.

About halfway through the night, with the group already high off sugar and stupid antics and party games, the Septics busted out the alcohol. It was easy to convince Wilford to join them, and _somehow _they persuaded Dark as well. Three drinks in, and Dark was drunk off her _ass_, giggly and aura swirling sluggishly behind her, her cheeks a dark grey. At some point, she ended up draped across Wilford’s lap and splayed out across the couch, one arm draped over her eyes and her tail reached up to wrap around Wilford’s throat. Wilford just flushed bright pink to match his hair, gazing down at her dumbly with one hand tangled in her hair between her horns. The others – both Septics and Egos alike – just cackled madly at the display. Even Anti (dressed like Morpheus from ‘The Matrix’) emerged briefly to poke fun at Dark for being such a giggly _lightweight_, and she just flipped him off and stuck her tongue out at him in response.

At last, the clock chimed twelve, and Jackie floated down from the ceiling, supported majorly by Silver and his accent ten times thicker. “Alllllright, guys, iss midnight!” He giggled when Midnight lifted her head, nose twitching and chattering as Robbie petted her clumsily. “Time t’judge fer the competition!”

Dark kicked off her high heels, waving a hand and they vanished in a puff of black smoke. With Wilford’s help, she sat up, grinning with her tail still wrapped around his throat like a collar. “We’re gonna win. Knew it the second we saw your decorations.”

Dr. Schneeplestein scoffed. “As _if_.”

Chase smirked, hat flipped around and makeup smudged. “Dude. We got _Google _freaked! That’s a win in my book!”

Bim pointed at him with narrowed eyes. “Hey! Hey no, that doesn’t count! Google’s scared of spiders, he freaked from one smaller than a pinky nail!”

Google flushed, crossing his arms. “I did _not!_”

Bing grinned. “Yeah you totally did, dude. I’ve got video evidence!”

Red snickered, hiding his face in Green’s shoulder, who was smirking with obvious amusement. Even Oliver was attempting to muffle his laughter, his yellow Twitter bird chirping on JJ’s shoulder. Google flushed further, turning his head away. “Shut the _fuck _up, Bing.”

Marvin winked, his swirling, glittery, blue and green aura shimmering around him, the alcohol affecting his ability to restrain it. “Then there’s nothing left to do but see _your _place.”

Dark’s grin widened, and she moved to wave her hand again, but Wilford caught her wrist. “Let’s _not _use the Void, my dear. You are _very _drunk, and we could end up anywhere. Besides, we’re not _that _far away.”

Dark pouted, the pointed tip of her tail grazing the underside of his chin. “Fine…”

Jackie leaned towards the wall, prompting Silver to fly him over. He banged a fist on the wall, head hanging limply. “_Anti!_ Are ye comin’ with or are ye too antisocial t’show up some poor bastards?”

There was a distinctive hiss, and then Anti was fizzling into existence in a cloud of static, arms crossed and the fluorescent green glow of his eyes visible even through his shades, the wound on his throat bleeding heavily. “Ì͚f̫̒ ̩̅ỹ̫o̬͐u͍͞ ̡͛ṱ̾h͍͑i͕͊ñ͎k̟̓ ̫͡I̭͡'͍͠m͓̕ ͍̚_ṅ͎ō̧t̙̾_ ̰̌g͙̓o̙̍n͇̓ṇ́a͓̅ ̲̍b̜͆ĕ̖ ̜̀t̯̆h̜͊e̯̾r͉̂e̝͘ ͙͑t̢͋ö́ͅ ̥̓t̛̯h͔͐r͙ǒ̻w̥͂ ̾͟į̽t̞͗ ̨̎i͘͢n͙̋ ̳͡D̢̐ạ̀r̲̚k̜̇'̼̾s̞̚ ͡ͅ f̠̋ä̯́c̘̐e̡̍ ̫̿t̬̎h̨̃ā͔t̪̾ ̖̚s̿͜h̋͟ḙ̕ ̣͗_s̙͘ư̫c̫̏k̤̄s̺͝_ ͚̎o̗̾ṉ̊ ̬̽m̘͑y͈͒ ͜͠_f̹̿a̘̚v̩õ͚ȑ͇ĩ̧ẗ͚ȩ̒_ ̤̔d͇̕a͇̐y̬̎ ̧̽o̤͡f̜̌ ̰̓ţ̈h̰͗e̺̎ ̣y̢̌e̦̾ą̈r̯̈ ̲̀y̬͐o̡͞u̘͊ ͉͛_c̻̒l̺e̟͂a̪̓r̞͊ḽ̊ỳ̮_ ͔͠d̻͛o̰͆ ͉̾n͚͒ó͈t̮̒ ͍̈k̗̉n̢͛o̺̾w̘̾ ̧m̗̎e̺̎.͉͘”

Dark laughed, leaning against Wilford with her back to him and her head tilted back to rest on his shoulder, her own eyes glowing bright in their respective red and blue. “In your _dreams_, Anti.”

JJ stood (and stumbled a little), brushing himself off before planting his hands on his hips. **“Then let’s go!”**

Let’s just say, any on-lookers would have been _very _concerned about the group of five drunk Septics, one tipsy psychopath, and one absolutely _hammered_ demon being led down the street by their fifteen kids, another bitchy demon, and a zombie.

Once they were in view of the manor, Dark split in a shit-eating grin as all seven of the Septics’ jaws _dropped_ (in Robbie’s case, quite literally). She’d let go of some of the spells that kept the manor running and presentable, leaving it looking run down and even decayed in some places. Creep vines and poison ivy overran the sides of the building, jack-o-lantern grinning menacingly and still attached to the vine growing throughout the main yard. The iron bars of the front gate and fence were rusty and filled with spiderwebs, and if one looked close enough they could see the metal _crawling _with thousands of black little bugs. But the _best _part was the thick, black smoke that leaked out of every window and crack in the third floor, dripping almost like a liquid sludge down the sides of the manor, reaching for Dark’s aura like a magnetic pull the second she was close enough.

The Septics all turned to her, even Anti looking awed and speechless and _very _pissed off. Dark giggled, leaning heavily on CJ (who was entirely supporting her). “Suck it, bitches.”

Wilford burst into giggles, walking over (with mild stumbling) over to Dark and taking her from CJ, her tail immediately wrapping around his throat once more. “Aright, I think it’s time to get you to a bed. Come on.” Within a blink, they were gone.

Jackie scoffed, sagging in Silver’s hold and making them drop a little in the air. “Well that’s fuckin’ _great_. You guys win, ye bastards.”

Reynolds crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. “We know.” He shrugged when Eric shot him a mildly distressed look, one that _screamed _‘Be a good sport’. “What?”

Ed rolled his eyes, then adjusted his hat. “As fun as this was, you guys should probably head home. You’re drunk as all fuck, the majority of you.”

Marvin narrowed his eyes, raising a finger to point at him and _attempted _to take a step forward, but he ended up stepping on his cape and falling face-first into the asphalt, not even attempting to get back up as Bim _laughed his ass off _beside him. “…Okay, you _may _you have…you point…_fuck_.”

Bim almost fell over himself he was laughing so hard, one hand gripping King’s shoulder and using him as support with the other wrapped around his middle, _wheezing _as he stared down at Marvin face-down on the asphalt. “You…you _dumbass!_”

Marvin grumbled something, raising a hand in a gesture that loosely resembling flipping Bim off, which only made him laugh harder, even King letting out a snort. “Fuck off, Mercury! You have _no idea _what being drunk feels like!”

Bim collected him himself a bit, crouching down beside Marvin and ruffling his hair, unable to control his giggling however when Marvin’s cat ears twitched irritably, his tail flicking against his cheek, and his aura clinging to his wrist. “And it’s moments like these that make me so _very _glad of that fact. Go home, Marv. I’ll see your hungover ass tomorrow at rehearsal, alright?”

Marvin just grumbled something else, and Bim straightened, immediately turning to whisper something in King’s ear, licking his fangs again, and they only had time to see the _rapid _blush spread across King’s face before the pair was gone as well.

Anti rolled his eyes with a loud scoff, hefting Marvin into his arms and revealing the fact that the magician had _completely _passed out. He rolled his eyes again, then turned to Jackie. “I̝̐'͚̏m͖͗ ̯͒ t̹́ä̠́k̲̈́i̢͡n̼͆g͑͜ ̣̽ṭ̽h̭̚i͉͆s̜̓ ̺̚m̡͛o͉̎r̍͢ȍ͍n̫͛ ̗̈́h̯͛ô͜m̿͜e͢͞.͇̈́ ̳͌H̨̛u͎͒ř͖ṛ͑y̭͐ ̩͆ȕͅp̤͊ ̨͞ȁ̻n͐͟d̢ ̜͝s͎̽ả͢y̛͓ ͖͒g̩͘ŏ̞o͟͠d̮̓-͌ͅḃ͓y̧̍ė̪ ͍̄ơ̘r̼̈ ͎̌w̻̓h̖̋a̠̋t̘ë̩́v̤̽ë̝́r̚͢,̻̿ ̡̚ỹ͍o͔̊u͈͌ ͖̂g͍̋ű͇ỷ̲s̹͠ ̣͘n̰͛ȅ̥ẻ̝d̦͛ ̞͌t̹͐o̝̓ ̳̅g̹͆o̦͊ ̘͛t̓͢o̗̊ ̦̋_b͈̒ë̙́d̞̍_.̥” And then they, too, were gone in a flash of static.

The twins exchanged looks, each holding onto one of Robbie’s hands. “Huh,” RJ said.

“Never thought we’d see Anti’s elusive parent side,” CJ finished.

Chase snorted, _very _drunk and being held upright by both Bing and Oliver. “Are you kidding me? He’s like…the-the-the _definition _of the overprotective Mom Friend. Or maybe, Mom _Sibling _in his case.”

Jackie laughed, lolling his head back, voice suddenly higher than usual. “Yeah, if one of us so much as gets a _splinter _he loses his shit.”

“I get a lot of business that way,” Dr. Schneeplestein muttered, the only one of the Septics who was only _slightly _tipsy besides Anti and Robbie (neither of who drank at all). “It can be annoying –”

**“_Very _annoying,” **JJ butt in, crossing his arms and speech slide popping up right in Dr. Schneeplestein’s face.

The Septic doctor batted it aside. “Yes well, it can be endearing at times, too. Anyway, he _is _right. We should be heading back.”

The Septics said their good-byes – mostly, at least, as Silver and the Jims had volunteered to walk them back home to make sure no one got hurt. Eric had happily let Robbie pet Midnight one last time before they had to leave, clearly having taken a shine to him much like the Jims had, and the egos left outside filed through the gate and back home, most of them collapsing into bed without even attempting to remove their makeup and just barely stripping of their costumes, passing out the instant they hit the mattress.

Google (finally free of that Godforsaken flower crown) curled around Bing, sighing heavily through his nose as Bing squirmed closer to him, burying his face in Google’s chest. Google chuckled as Bing yawned loudly and with enough force to make his core stutter, only to yawn hugely himself, ending it with a pleased hum and pressing his face to Bing’s hair. He was mildly surprised when Bing spoke up, words muffled with exhaustion and Google’s shirt. “…Did you have a good birthday? Considering this is like, the first time ever you’ve actively celebrated it.”

Google chuckled again. “I enjoyed it immensely. And the added pleasure of unsettling _everyone _simply by getting them to _look_ at me was a _lovely _bonus.”

Bing snorted, shifting closer with his hands coming up to fist in Google’s shirt. “Well that’s good. I’m glad. I love you, Google.”

Google pressed a kiss to the top of his head, holding him tighter and closing his eyes. “Love you, too, Bing.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Look at this idiot beans_  
Also, **I drool over Fem!Devil!Dark, holy shit oh my God I love her -**  
And it doesn't end here! As promised, there is an ego horror story to go with this! Go check that out too!
> 
> Tumblr: doctordiscord123.tumblr.com


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